i’ve never been a big sports fan.
shocking, right?
don’t get me wrong… i like to watch sports live. i like to know enough to be engaged in a conversation when friends are discussing the latest sporting world news. and i like to play almost every sport i have tried. i am not good at many of them, but i enjoy the challenge and the activity.
but for the longest time i have had a huge aversion to following sports.
i have no favorite team.
i don’t pick favorite players.
i’m just not invested.
… not usually.
but beginning last year, and really gaining steam this year, i have begun to really grow into a pretty serious hogs fan. i enjoy watching a team that i feel some connection to (living in arkansas, there aren’t many chances for that). and i enjoy the camaraderie of watching games with friends who are also pulling for a win. and i enjoy the thrill of a come back win… something the hogs gave us several of this year.
and so i found myself nearing the end of the season with the realization that i am a fan. it took me a little by surprise. but i liked it.
i could talk with colleagues around the table at lunch on mondays about the hogs, about the sec in general. and i like that.
i would be proud for a couple of days after each win.
i even asked for a hogs long sleeve t-shirt for christmas!
still, i am a realist. and i was the voice of reason among my circles, telling friends and family that though it was possible, it was highly unlikely that the hogs would win against lsu the day after thanksgiving this year. i mean they are #1 for a reason. their defense is tough as nails, and they play 4 full quarters of football.
i would say something like, “is it possible that the hogs could win? yes… but it’s not going to happen.”
still friends were talking smack against lsu and posting comments all over their facebook and twitter accounts about how the hogs were going to wipe lsu out. one local church even posted what i found to be a highly offensive and even unchristian dig on their sign against lsu, “there is good in most things… lsu is the exception”
and so game day came.
and i was stoked!
i knew it was a long shot, but after the way the hogs had played in their last few games, it really was possible.
the game opened and the hogs began to prove that it was indeed possible. the hogs were the first to score, putting lsu down for only the third time in their season. arkansas scored again making the score 14 – 0 and giving lsu their largest trailing margin of the season.
i was excited.
…
but
then the hogs fell apart. dropped passes, missed catches, stupid penalties, and flat-out sloppy playing.
and i got angry.
i don’t mind my team losing, but to throw the game away on bad playing? i can’t handle that.
…
and then i remembered why i am not a fan.
i remembered why i have such a hard time following a team.
it stems from the fact that i can’t do anything half way. if i am in, i am all in. and when i am a fan, i get completely emotionally invested in the success of the team. i want to win. i expect my team to show up every time and i expect every player to give it all and play with heart. then, even if we lose, i can handle it.
and the truth of the matter is that there are times when the team is going to fall short of that standard. poor morale, bad communication, disheartening game circumstances… there are alot of things that can cause a team to give a less than fully committed performance.
i need more dependability than that.
i can’t be that invested in something that unpredictable.
___
and i guess that is why i am such a fan… not of the hogs, but of God.
i know the future is secure in his hands.
i know that he shows up every time, and he always brings his a-game.
i know that with God, there is no opponent so big, or strong, or cunning so to gain the victory over me.
i know the final score.
i know the champion.
and i know that he has picked me to be on his team.
he has given me the gear for success.
he has put me into strict training.
and we will win the victory!
we will win!!
